Ah lians and ah bengs. The reason why we're having global warming.

Listening to - Wordplay Jason Mraz
Mood - Annoyed

(Massive use of profanities, reader discretion is advised. Sorry for it but piss and rant posts needs impact.)
Time to rant:

I gotta rant about stupid ah lians, ah beng, or twits.
You know those annoying 13 year old girls and guys who try to act cute in their friendster pictures and their profile has black background with red (or better even, black background with stupid black words [or any other colour that can't be seen with a black background]) words?
And with their stupid profile information like this:

miE nAm3 iish... sto0p!d aah l!aNn
m!e lykK3s 2 shopPin.sLackiin.N. sLp!nn orhxx!
(Translation: My name is stupid ah lian. Me likes to shopping, slacking,
and sleeping orh)

That took me at least 2 minutes to type. I know I shouldn't waste my time on it but I just wanted to experience how the hell these people do it. This is a good reason why we should listen to our English teachers. If the future of the world is in the hands of these youths, I reckon that getting killed by global warming or the sun bursting is far better.
And what's with the stupid names they give themselves?! E.g: ya tou, bendan, xiao xiao. And their profiles which are filled with at least 500000000000 glitter pictures that hang your computer.

*cries* This is too much for me to take.




What can be more annoying than 13 year olds that have no brains annihilating our earth? And I swear they don't use spell check.



And these pricks have the cheek to tell us on their friendster pictures that they dress lolita. If you are not wearing a frilly dress which a frilly parasol then you don't have the right to waste the earth's oxygen by stating to everyone that you dress lolita.

All you are wearing is a stupid mini skirt that barely cover up your fat thighs and some stupid shirt that's too long for your own good. And your habit of tying your hair even though your hair is as short as fuck is not impressing me.

DO YOU EVEN KNOW WHAT THE HELL IS LOLITA?!

This is lolita:











And cibai you look like fucking this don't you dare fucking say you're lolita:




If you state that you're in decora fashion, maybe it's acceptable if you're having 500 hair clips and bags cause you're using pink everywhere.

And no one cares about your godsis, godbro, kors or meis.

I've heard that ah lians are into navel or ear piercings.
If I were to have a piercing now is to be at the lip cause I don't think any of you ah lian ah beng fuckheads will do it. And I really wanna have a piercing, but I don't wanna be grouped into the category you twits are in.

Cao Ci Bai. (Irony, since ah lians/ah bengs like to use hokkien profanities) I am so fucking pissed.

And oh my God their hair.
You already have straight hair, stop rebonding it! It's okay to rebond when you have curls, but when your hair is dead straight and doesn't need harming, then don't fucking do it. Stupid ah lians wanna waste their money for no reason.
For the ah bengs, stop dying your hair shit yellow for hell's sake. It's not even blond, or brown, it's shit!




How can you not be angry or scared looking at that colour? It's okay if you're naive or if you were threatened by Godzilla, but if you do that for at least a year already by your own will... Then I have nothing more to say about it.

I know people can do whatever they want to their hair, but to do that and still think it's hot then please look in the mirror! It's not like David Beckham or Brad Pitt does that shit colour. Get it off your head, PLEASE.

And their taste in music. God save me from this, I beg of You, please.

They listen to no class techno and headbang all day in discos or kbox. I usually don't diss music but this is a serious exception. Ah beng techno consist of crazy drums and bass and incoherent lyrics, or no lyrics at all, and are usually meaningless. This is music is usually only heard by crackheads or your typical ah beng or ah lian. It's fine if it's in the form of satire or sarcasm, but when you think it's the most 'geng' thing the world, then my ah lian/beng, you need to download limewire and listen to Britney Spears, cause I bet you clearly have not heard better music than your cao techno.






Just fucking kill me now. Please. (To be honest I like the front part, the way he curses is pretty wow actually, even if he is a cao ah beng)




Eh. Google and ah bengs/lians have enlighten me so much. I now know ways to be ah lian so I can avoid it. And anyone I know, if I am a ah lian, take my pet rock and whack it at my head please. If I still don't wake up, take a M 16 and shoot me please. (Arrows are also optional)

Cibai. After this rant finish I'm still pissed. Damn you ah bengs/lians.




*back to normal* Sorry for the profanities. I'm not this vulgar on a daily basis. *coughs* Really.

Hope everyone has a nice day and won't meet any ah lians/bengs on your way to school or work or anything.